Frequency · Interrupted

Oh hey. It's been a while.

I have in the past six months started a new job, relocated, become single, got my first 70 character on WoW, got to see Coheed & Cambria LIVE (omgomgomg), actually wrote something (!!!) and found a little in the way of new romance. I've also, in the past six months, lost touch with pretty much everyone I know from LJ and unfortunately become addicted to Facebook.

But I'm alive, and I'm happy. :)

I have ulterior motives to making this post; in light of the most awesomest, amazingest, mind-blowingest concert I've ever attended last Friday, I'm posting here with a plea to any all artists. I would like somebody to design me a tattoo working around the main symbol of Coheed & Cambria, the Keywork:

But I want as well the C & C dragonfly to be incorporated somehow, and that's where my creative abilities (and they are very limited) ran dry. If somebody actually is interested I'll dig up the picture of the dragonfly. I want this tattoo to for my leg, medium sized. I'm not looking for color, either.

I am going to pay the artist for this endeavour, because this tattoo is going to be very important to me. There's one person I'd like to pester for this but I think she's awfully busy. So I'm looking for anyone willing to give it a go; I want it to have the Keywork and dragonfly but I want it to have more than just those two things, if that makes any sense. x)

If anyone's interested in tackling this, or if anybody knows anybody who'd be willing to try it, please just let me know and I'll dig up a picture of the dragonfly. And lemme know how much you / they will be charging.

Cheers! ~

So. First of all, happy Thanksgiving to all ye Canadians (even those of you living in faraway mythical places of wonder like Japan <3).

Most of you I know on LJ are writers of some type. And I've been wondering if you all have the same kind of issue, whether you consider it minor or major, in terms of your writing and how it relates to the people in your life. My family, while aware that I write, has absolutely no idea what I write. While they've been encouraging in vague, roundabout ways, they've never really come out and asked to see what I write or offered to critique. This hasn't bothered me at all in the years since writing became a serious pasttime for me, but for some reason lately it's started to.

I used to be happy with the only people reading my work being the ones online that I would most likely never meet--they would find my work of their own volition and read it only if they felt the need. I never have liked pimping my work out and begging others to read it; that said, I suffer from praise addiction (nothing makes me happier than reviews from readers in my inbox) and I have whored out some of my work on various comms and boards.

Iunno if it's a side effect of a recent blow to my ego, or whether I've just finally become self-absorbed to the nth degree, but I really wish the people closest to me would take a significant interest in what quite possibly could be the thing I love most in the world to do. Just to have my father actually have some inkling of what I write about, and to be able to bounce ideas off of him would be lovely. The more I think about it, the more I think maybe it's best if my mother remains comfortably oblivious. But I used to be able to talk stories over with my brother, and once upon a time he was my greatest aid (back when I was rewriting Dragonlance novels to suit my own childish fantasies on a grand scale). Life has made him busy and succesful, but I know he'd take a look if I asked him too.

And there you have it. Several longwinded, drawn out paragraphs about an issue that links directly to my need to feel proud by way of praise others bestow upon me. Or maybe it's less that than the desire to know that the people I care about are aware that I'm capable of doing something, and doing it well. I'm entirely passive about this matter, which doesn't help; rather than ask people to read what I write, I'll just leave it be and assume that they'll ask if they want to. Sometimes assertive gets you places that being a complete pushover won't.

On a more interesting note, I've seen Across the Universe twice and I love every minute of it. The soundtrack is just the right mix of bouncy/happy and pensive/sad to keep me happy for weeks to come. Eastern Promises was dark and intense and almost too gritty for me, but I really enjoyed it, too (although the ending was complete bullshit, imo). And even though I'm not a large fan of it, I'm going to join the masses and go see the Rocky Horror Picture Show at the Princess (?) Theatre on Halloween.

Which will be followed by a zombie walk. And I'm actually quite excited about that. x3

~Tschus <3

Today I had an important meeting with some important people. I was nervous, but hey, I can be calm and suave. So while in said meeting, I was drinking my daily morning dose of uber, sickly sweet hot chocolate (fresh from the local 7-11, oh yes!), and I managed to miss my mouth quite spectacularily and splash brown liquid quite unbecomingly all over my boob.

I have large boobs. They're kinda hard to miss even without a large circular hot chocolate stain. And the outer shirt I chose to wear today (it's white D:) makes the stain stand out even worse. So with a quick, witty remark (or at least I thought it was witty) I excused myself swiftly, ran to the bathroom, and scrubbed at the stain. And the aftermath of this was an even larger wet stain, which, as a coworker remarked upon entering the bathroom while I panicked, made it look like I was lactating.

So, the lesson here is not to drink hot chocolate on Fridays when you're wearing a white shirt.

Also, in the bathroom, I discovered my really ugly necklace (it looks like something a gypsy coughed up) has some glow in the dark elements. Unfortunately, I still had to return to the meeting with my boob stain. :[

In other news. I have issues with sleep. It's to the point where I've been taking Gravol not only because I've been feeling like shit, but jointly because it makes me tired like whoa. I am aware that this is not wise, and will not do it again. Also, it reminds me of my dear friend and former roommate, who is addicted to sleeping meds and I remember the way her addiction worried me. On that note, I found out a couple weeks ago that said friend has cancer. She had a lump removed from under her arm, and upon further testing it was revealed the lump was malignant. The lump was the primary site and the cancer hadn't spread through or from the lymph nodes, but she still has to undergo surgery to have some muscle tissue removed (and if some other tests aren't clean, she may lose breast tissue, too). She undergoes surgery next Tuesday, and if you can spare a moment or two, will you think of or pray for her?

It's only 4ish days til Transformers. And then like a week til the new Harry Potter movie is released. And while normally I'm very excited by these two facts, today I just kinda smile and nod. At any rate, I'm hoping one or both of these movies will kick me screaming girlishly back into the world of fandoms. Because you're never really a fanfiction writer until you've written mechanoid pr0n. Giggle. Bad, bad, bad. D:

I owe apologies to many of you for real or imagined slights. I'm horrendous at keeping in touch. I'm grouchy when we do talk. And you, if you read this--I'm so very sorry for everything, I love you, and I'm thinking of you.

Cheers~

Why is it that when you know beyond a doubt that the smartest thing for you to do would be to leave and not wait for something you know isn't going to happen, you just can't make yourself go?

Or maybe that's just me.

Tis summer, and it's about damn time. I can appreciate a little sunlight, even though I'm more partial to days of low-hanging clouds and sheets of gentle rain. But that'd drive everyone around me insane, and I can always head to Vancouver if I need that much moisture. :]

I'm alive. And I've become a sheep joined the masses in discovering Facebook, and through Facebook found friend upon friend I've had, been with, and lost through any number of circumstances. I've discovered that life has taken us all in very different directions than we hoped/planned; the fact that three of aforementioned people have mustered the courage to teach in Japan/Korea on nothing more than a whim has enticed me, much to my surprise. But it hasn't gone further than that, and I don't think it will. There are other, more important things on this continent that I love enough to be happily grounded here.

I always have resolutions for the four months of summer; the only one that's of real importance to me at this point is rediscovering the desire to write. I've had loss of drive many times before, but this has almost been an entire year (last time I wrote something substantial and of note was last August), and I'm a little worried. A little sad, too. I miss creation, I miss the urge to type all I can as fast as I can, and I miss the contentment I had when I finished something I could be proud of. But such is life; maybe I'm only a sometimes writer, or maybe I only wrote because I had nothing else to fill that void. Who knows? Either way, I despair a little.

And there we are--unimportant post about my unexciting life, but I'm happy (or as happy as I can be, stuck in limbo with my parents while I wait for an affordable housing opportunity to jump out in front of me). A long weekend looms before me, and with it comes many things I want to do: head to the Valley Zoo to see Boris the Siberian francophone tiger, see any movie other than Pirates III (Knocked Up looks very good to me), do something drastic that would cost a great deal (sketched a new tattoo on my lunch break today), and just in general enjoy a day without worry.

So cheers, kids, and I hope this finds you all well. May your summers be as beautiful as mine is shaping up to be. <3

Dilemma:

Live in the basement suite in the mansion outside of town, sharing a house with a 50 year old divorcee and having no internet access whatsoever?

OR

Hold out for a cramped and most likely over priced apartment/suite in town with a shorter drive to work and high speed?

Sad, really, that internet speed is almost the deciding factor here. xD

In other news, stalk me. Because it's not cool to have only two friends. And because everyone else is doing it, and I'm a sheep. ;3

There are times I would gladly trade my ovaries for something nifty, like a cast iron frying pan or maybe a new muffler for my car. Today would be one of those times. I spent most of the day seesawing forth between a state of hyper, nonsensical giddiness and threadbare irritation (and it didn't take much to shove me over into anger, oh no). Left the house near 4:00 on a quest for food, drove to the park and took my dinner out to the playground, where I claimed the nifty treehouse slide as my own and intimidated the little kids away. As I ate I speculated on the fact that it was a beautiful Saturday (by Alberta standards--no snow, above zero degrees, only a little wind) and that I'd done absolutely sweet fuck all with it in terms of productivity. Decided I didn't really care (spent time with my boyo, and that's really all that matters), and was just about to go when I heard someone say my name.

Spent the next hour or so doing stupidly childish things with other people from my class. I don't know them well, and don't even like half of them, but I have a fetish for mud puddles (driving through them, running through them, standing in them ...) and I can warm to anybody who likes them as much as I do. So the six college kids conquered the park known as Craig's Corner, and between shoving each other down the slide and trying to soak each other by running and jumping in puddles, I was thoroughly covered in a mixture of mud, water and melting snow.

Somewhere along the way the idea of going dancing came up. I am, in phases, an extreme introvert. But they asked, and I said yes, and while writing this I've gotten up to stare at myself in the mirror several times to wonder if jeans and a HIM hoodie is alright attire for the Texas Mickey. And then I remind myself I don't care, but remain nervous all the same. I'm not much for country music, or cowboy bars, or dancing at all for that matter (at least to hick music), but here goes nothing.

Wish me luck. It's been a while, and I hope I remember how to socialize. :]

After what's been nearly a year since I've last made an adventurous excursion, I had the good fortune of joining friends I hadn't seen in far too long for a day of fun on Saturday. I've been somewhat of a hermit the past several months, and Saturday kind of drove the point home on how much I've been missing out on.

Suffice to say, Shan and Leah and I set out from the middle of nowhere and ventured into the great E-Town, where we were joined by the lovely taekwonangel. We went to see 300, which while being very entertaining was also the point of giggly speculation. For, you see, you cannot have nearly naked men rolling around on the ground together tossing ribald and teasing remarks back and forth to each other without picking up on a sliver of attraction between them. Or maybe you can, but in my case I thought it was blatantly obvious. (Or maybe I've just read too much slash during my time as a fangirl. Who knows?) Anyhoo. Twas a nifty movie, it was, although some of the dialogue made me snort. But it's silly of me to expect such intricacies, I suppose, in the conversion from graphic novel to movie. Take note! Tis fun to argue about the slash subtext with anybody posessing testicles who also enjoyed the movie, as I've done with giggly results with my boyo. <3

Aside from the movie, the day was nifty on its own. Sabe and I roamed Best Buy, saving the store and all in it from the vile sounds of Nickelback blaring from the mp3 players (we switched one of them to Elton John's "Rocket Man", which I find giggly in that I'd rather rock out to that than Nickelback, oh yes.) The day also included being called "Barbies" by a random passerby, Leah and I fumbling very badly with chopsticks and my instructing Shannon on methods that could be used to aid girls in urinating like men. I giggled muchly and thoroughly enjoyed mineself, and cannot wait to do it again soon. (Speaking of which, Sabe, will you be around on the 24th ...?)

Also - Mommah, the green yarn is pretty, and for some reason I had a dream about it. See? You influence me greatly, you do. I dreamt you made me a loinclothy thing for a movie I was starring in, in which I had the role of Vailbryn. Rawrs. XD

Oh oh! I was also reminded this weekend that I heart Astro Boy. Old 1980's vintage Astro Boy. Not the newest one. (Atlas was much cooler in the old version, oh yes, and I fangirled him in my youth). And I'm kicking myself for not buying the box set when I saw it on Saturday. D:

I write this on three hours of sleep and a mild, but swiftly dissapating, caffeine buzz.

Firstly, kudos to all of ye who girded your loins and decided to spearhead NaNo; lack of inspiration, lack of any desire to write and a bit of tumult (the good kind) in my personal life made me decide not to do it this year. Secondly, I acknowledge any and all of you in school and send you love and happy thoughts, because currently my classes are driving me insane (I think a lot about lighting fires of late D:), and I hope the rest of you have it better. Thirdly, it's almost Christmas (FAWK!) and ah ... well, we'll save that for a later post.

Last night I said goodbye to a very good friend who's headed off to boot camp, and despite earlier resolve, I started to cry almost immediately. My friends online mean as much to me as those I've had all my life, and that statement includes many of you. So don't you all go leaving somewhere, cuz I'll have to cry, and we would not want that. D:

(/rambling of the exhausted variety.)

Ah ... yeah. Life is well at this point, mostly, and I hope it's the same for all of you. ^^

Well, midterms have reared their ugly, ugly heads, and I've girded my loins and taken two head on with what is (I hope) admirable effort. Other than that and the occasional unsavory friendship/relationship hiccup, life seems to be sailing smoothly, and I hope it's doing the same for all of you.

And because I needed giggles last night, and the following brought them to me, I thought I'd share this with you: ( Nekkid in Saint Morning )

Because I wanted to show these to Mommah, I figured I'd make everyone else look at them too. The following is the one thing that has kept me from screaming, from crying, from exploding and from lighting this house on fire these last few days.

( Piper. )

As far as kittens go, I know he's not uber cute. But there's something about having an animal who cuddles up between your neck and shoulder and purrs in your ear when you feel like crap that makes things seem a little less ... argh. It's nice to know that there is something out there that will love you unconditionally no matter how bad a mood you're in. =)

I know I haven't been all that eloquent and polite the past few days, so I apologize to those of you I've ranted/raved/snapped on. Just please bear with me; I can't be like this forever.

Also, Sabe: I'm sorry I wasn't around last night to take you up on your offer, but I really do appreciate the fact that you made it.

Inspired by the happiness of a friend when she told me she was engaged earlier tonight:

( Love story? )

Also--to the guy behind me in line at the store tonight who bought all my stuff for me when I ran to get my wallet out of my car--thank you. The fact that you did it just because I was wearing a Transformers hoodie made it all that much better. ^^

Random acts of kindness = one of the best things ever. Also, I'm beyond amused that articles of my clothing incite others to buy things for me. I need a new car like whoa ... XD

List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words, or even if they're not any good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying now. Post these instructions in your LiveJournal along with your seven songs. Then tag seven other people to see what they're listening to.

Red Flag--Billy Talent

It's kind of anthem-y. I hated it at first.

Vent--Collective Soul

"I love you cuz you're such a prick."

Devil Woman--Cradle of Filth

This is kind of mellow for CoF, which is part of why I like it so much And it's a remake, I just don't know who did the original.

Wonderful Tonight--Eric Clapton

Mushy love song, which by default is why I like it. Plus, it's a classic, and if I ever get married it may be to this song.

Smoking Umbrellas--Failure

The song I listen to the most, currently. Failure is a band I'm slowly learning to adore.

Lotion--GreensKeepers

Basically, it refers heavily to Silence of the Lambs, one of my favourite books since ever.

Disposition--Tool

This song can mellow me out in no time flat. It also makes me inexplicably sad most of the time. Listen to it when it's raining and you'll see what I mean.


I tag whomever so feels inclined to do this. =)

I was getting acquainted with Silkroad today when I saw something I had to take a screenshot of:

Most of you know that I name everything Niblet. It was too cute of a coincidence to not take a picture of. XD

I have this habit of detesting songs when I first hear them, and then coming to love them suddenly. The most recent example is The Grace by Neverending White Lights. I really wasn't a fan, but then yesterday when I heard it on the radio in my car I promptly burst into tears. So now it's that one song that I keep coming back to on my playlist, so I can get more and more depressed (and more and more inspired to write sad, hopeless tragedies).

Angst. <3

And Sabe, if you read this, I'm definitely interested in a copy of your RX FST. I tried to leave a comment under your post, but it wouldn't let me. =(